Friday, March 31, 2006

DUMBHEAD ME

woooo! i got a job! i will be helping answer phones and show condos at an office i can actually walk to! and they pay well. it's actually a job with a woman i met last night. she knows it is temporary, but they need someone now and there is also weekend work, so i can bank some cash and perhaps buy a hybrid sooner than later! and organic kitty food, and new shoes, and a vacation for me and my lady!

i am getting ahead of myself. but still, knowing there is money in my future makes me very happy indeed.

the woman who hired me also alerted me to how stupid i am. "lori, i do want to let you know that your phone number is incorrect on your resume."

wha?

my heart stopped. "maybe it's not that you are unmarketable, it's that people can't get in touch with you."

my face turned crimson.

she still hired me though. i start sunday, training for 2 hours. yipppeeee!

getting hit on by an 18 year old

well, folks, i still have it. hells yeah. even kids in high school want me. what an interesting night indeed. you may be wondering how a chick still in high school and i ended up at a place where she could try to ask me out? melissa ferrick's concert last night. ahhhhh. melissa. she's so hot and so good and so full of herself, i can't help myself from liking her.

i went to the show with a friend i've made here who is in her 40s. her friend has a daugher who is also gay, and daughter brought her GF (they are 15... so young! so cute!) and they made friends with the 18 year old. and so we all ended up at the same table for the concert. i was literally in between the ages - 44 the high, 15 the low. and then there's me. the high schoolers thought i was 23. ah. not anymore, thank god. the daughter asked me "what do you think about 18 year olds?" wink wink. i don't.

DC is proving to be interesting, but i'm not quite convinced yet. i haven't found my niche. not yet.

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

TAKE THAT, Republican lady!

Dunno where Minnie got this, but it's frickin' awesome!

On Wednesday, March 1, 2006, in Annapolis at a hearing on the proposed
Constitutional Amendment to prohibit gay marriage, Jamie Raskin,
professor of law at AU, was requested to testify.

At the end of his testimony, Republican Senator Nancy Jacobs said:
"Mr. Raskin, my Bible says marriage is only between a man and a woman.
What do you have to say about that?"

Raskin replied: "Senator, when you took your oath of office, you
placed your hand on the Bible and swore to uphold the Constitution.
You did not
place your hand on the Constitution and swear to uphold the Bible."

The room erupted with applause.

Is it only Tuesday?

Geesh. I felt quite accomplished this morning - finished a book, Jeannette Winterson's The Passion. I am not sure why my lady loved it so much. Apparently it is going to be a movie starring Gwenyth Paltrow and Julianne Moore. I found it too depressing for my current state of mind. Brilliantly written, yes. But sad.

And then I considered going for a run, but quickly changed my mind when I realized how cold it is outside. Ok ok ok, it's only 48 degrees, but that seems bone-chilling cold to me, especially in this apartment that holds no heat whatsoever. This will be handy when the promised warm weather comes.. but now? Chiiiiiillllllllyyyy. Even with the heat on, my nose is cold! The windows in the living room are cracked, but my landlord can't replace them because the condo association has a rule that the windows must be replaced by one specific contractor. Said contractor has gone out of business. That leaves my cracked windows cracked and no hope for a replacement. I wonder if the folks who belong to the condo association would drag their feet if THEIR windows were cracked. Bastards. I know it's not my landlord's fault and I don't want to get into a fight about it (yet), but come next winter? Either the windows get replaced or my heating bill is paid for by someone else.

Instead of facing the cold outside, I spent 30 minutes blowing up my Pilates ball with a handheld bike pump. That sort of counts as a workout, right? Nah. If I am to keep baking and eating like Martha, I have to work out daily. So I am back to Pilates. It feels gooooood. It's true - working out makes the mind happy. Getting there is hard, but doing it is gooood.

Sunday, March 26, 2006

showering is tedious

it's sunday morning, and i was awakened by the disco ring on my phone. second day in a row my family woke me up! i suppose it would do me good to go to bed earlier and get up before 10am. someday i will have a job, and i'm hoping it's not 2nd shift.

i got up, watched CBS sunday morning - the geriatric show that i love - and made eggs and toast. and then i took a shower. but why? it doesn't even matter. i have nothing to do, no one to see, and yet i keep to this american routine of morning showers. i dry my hair, put on makeup, throw on clothes, and sit around the house. a therapist once told me that if i start to change my routine, stop showering or getting ready or caring about what i look like, then that is a sign of depression.

what if i just don't want to waste my resources, my expensive products, and my energy on looking good for the kitties?

Friday, March 24, 2006

wrinkled nose

what does it mean when the person interviewing you wrinkles her nose as you leave? there was a panel of 3 people - the other 2 were nice, but the exec dir was just plain strange. and tho' the interview went well enough, when i was leaving one of the nice women recommended an agency here that i could get involved with if i wanted to volunteer or get to know folks doing progressive work with sex workers. and i thanked her and mentioned that in NOLA, i wanted to get involved but there was nothing really going on because that city was pretty disorganized.

that's a fact. social services were disorganized, pre-katrina. nevermind now!

and she wrinkled her nose!! eh? i am not so sure i'd want to work with her. i had a terrible boss at my old job pre-grad school, and she made it hard to work. well, somedays she made it hard to work - most days she stayed out of my way. heh.

back to the drawing board i think. eh.

Thursday, March 23, 2006

waiting for a package

my baby sister sent me a package yesterday, and it's due to arrive between 9am and noon. it's 11.38am and still not here. i am waiting for it to arrive before i shower and my *nerves* are being *worked*. WTF? where is it?!?! i have an interview at 2pm and girl needs time to get ready! everything is ironed and ready to be put onto my clean body. T-21 minutes now. then i'm going in.

that girl is crazy anyhow, spending $22 to send an overnight package to me! love her.

for those of you unable to watch martha and ellen everyday, let me fill you in. martha's cooking school is becoming very meat focused - today was meatballs, meatloaf, and meatball lasagna. how to make the perfect meatball. ick. and ellen had musical guest natasha bettingfield or benningfield or whatever her name is, and girl sounds like a smoker. like tom waits. how is it that she's famous? oh, and for the last verse of her song, she brought in a choir to back her up. hrm.

and that's it. wish me luck!

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

grated skin

i had a little chunk of parmesan leftover from.. hmmm. i can't remember. oh! from when i made C that pasta dish last sunday. last night, i made my potato kale soup and i was looking forward to the leftovers, but i was craving cheese. on the food network webiste, i found a super easy recipe for parmesan crisps - just grate parmesan cheese, put it in small piles (about one tablespoon each) on a cooking sheet with a silpat (this is necessary!) and press down lightly on the cheese piles. pop it in the oven (preheated to 400 degrees) for about 5 minutes, until lightly browned. let them cool and they are like parmesan potato chips. salty and yummy and perfect.

except mine had a little problem. i grated my hand.

ooooooowwwwwwwwwwccchhiieee! frickin' hurts! i had to search for my piece of skin in the pile of cheese. *vomit* nah, just kidding, the skin remained on my hand, hanging by a thread of, um, skin.

Monday, March 20, 2006

the DC scene

last night i went out to check out the dyke scene here in DC. i was pretty intimidated to go alone, but earlier in the week i chatted with this girl online who was going alone too. she put something out on craigslist and i responded, along with 8 other girls going solo. the plan was to all meet at the bar at 6.30pm. she said she was 5'7", slender, short brown hair, and would be wearing black.

just about 75% of the chicks there met that description.

i sat at the bar and a woman too short to be her came over and started to chat with me. she was super nice and it turned out she knew tons of people there. two of her friends came over, and the 4 of us were having a great time hanging out. i was younger by a decade (at least) and i really liked it. maybe hanging out with minnie and her over-40 club at toast showed me the light with the age issue. i'd rather be a decade younger then the crew instead of a decade older. i can't keep up with the 21 year olds. ugh.

i saw a girl with fantanstic shoes and i remembered jennifer's policy of saying nice things to people at random. i interrupted her and admired her shoes. she was tall, slender, and had super short hair, and creamy gorgeous skin - she's black. i didn't bother to ask her if she was the online girl - i just wanted to know where her shoes came from. "thanks! i got them in LA!" of course she did. "i'm relieved to see that you have smaller feet than me, otherwise you might take me into the bathroom and beat me up just to steal them!" of course i would.

our little group started to dance (the music was from my posse's generation) and some random chick was was staring at me earlier (not the online girl, too tall and not slender and had blond hair and was wearing stripes) came over and asked if she could buy me a drink. then, this woman she was with came over to one of the posse and asked her if she was my girlfriend. ??? she said no, then went back to report to tall stripes girl. OMG, i've been in the scene for 2 hours and i am in drama! then, the DJ comes over and says she wants to talk to me. she knows someone in the posse and we had met earlier. she brings me behind the DJ booth and asks me if i wear dresses. she proceeds to give me a crushed red velevet dress with faux fur trim that says stoli. OMG, i've been here for a minute and the DJ is giving me treats!!!

goldigger came on and i hit the dance floor (the generations knew the song but not how to dance to it). shoe girl comes over and is dancing up a storm all up on me, around me, she's hot and she knows it. she makes some comment about how i dance (me loves kanye west) and i ask her name. she's the online girl i was supposed to meet! she's not white! i thought she was white, i don't know why, i thought she'd have a bob and she'd be wearing black with jeans or something.

she's bi.

of course. this chick she met corners me and tells me she got the "bi vibe" from me because i was wearing tight clothes. and that she doesn't like girls who aren't proud to be girls. i get away from her and talk with one of the posse about it (i was steaming mad at the in-hating) and then i left. came home to watch the L word, slit my wrists and go to bed.

Friday, March 17, 2006

my stealin' days are over!

my lady just called to inform me that verizon has turned us ON! she caught me sitting in my usual spot on 37th st. i think the old lady who lives in one of these houses has caught onto my robin hood ways. this is the last day, lady. IN YOUR FACE!

today my best friend e is coming to visit. yippeeeee! wooohoooooo! i can hang out with an adult! someone to talk to and ot explore DC with! i. am. so. excited!!!

in other news, the kitties had a very hard day at the vet yesterday. they are zonked. they got all sorts of shots, bloodwork, and a fecal examination. the vet is a smart man and took them away from me to do those last 2 nasty things. eewww, the vet stuck something up their buns and took a smear. i would have fainted.

me needs to go to the grocery store to stock up for my visitor! and for the bird flu. my sister said it's going to be bad, that we'll be under house arrest for 2 months!

this is what happens when someone with anxiety listens to NPR.

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

hire me because i am sooooo great. really.

urgh. this is tedious. hire me, hire me, hire me please! all these cover letters, all this searching, it's exhausting.

and all the sweet words of encouragement are working on my nerves.

if i was so goddamned qualified, i'd have a F'ing job by now.

Monday, March 13, 2006

mornings with martha

i am becoming a baker. i think i should have a total career change to chef or baker. it won't work because i won't touch meat, and because i don't have any money to open a bakery that features a few savory options. wish i could meet a rich person who wants to fund someone with zero experience to open a groovy cafe with FREE wifi and good tunes. i'd call it Sassy. oh dreams.

this month, martha has cooking school - every day she is giving good, solid tips on cooking. thus far, she hasn't taught me anything. but i look forward to learning a new trick. i love being in the kitchen, surrounded by the mess i make while i create food. i love cleaning up, i love serving food, i love making simple dishes and complex dishes and feeding people. too bad i've figured this out post-masters degree. don't need my MPH to bake. shiiiiiiit. wish i went to business school.

another monday. another week to job hunt and hear my phone ring only when my lady calls me.

Thursday, March 09, 2006

Days Repeat

I am going to practice typing with capital letters and appropriate grammar. I’m also thinking about giving up swearing. Perhaps this newfound desire to make change is influenced by my two local friends giving up things for Lent – C is giving up sweets and M is giving up dining out. Being completely unreligious, I don’t dig on the Lent thing. But I do believe in making attempts to be a better person, so I thought I’d drop the cursing. This is pretty classist, though. (Damn, classist came up as a typo. What to do, what to do!) Why is swearing looked down upon? Remove religion from the debate, and who gives a !@#$%! if I swear.

My new daily routine: up at 10am for Martha and a latte. I hop in the shower when The View gets boring. Around noon, I leave and try to find free WIFI. Thus far, I can get to two Panera Breads. I think there are two more in the area that I need to locate. I cannot wait to get online here at home. Yesterday, I picked up a signal in my parking spot. Pathetic.

The 25 year old chef on Martha just taught me a new trick – to get more juice out of a lemon, heat the lemon in the microwave for 10 seconds first. I’m into cooking and baking right now. I made baba ganoush last night and chocolate chip cookies in a cookie. That recipe sort of disappointed. You make 10 cookies but only bake them halfway, then let them cool and crumble them into the rest of the dough. It is supposed to give you crunchy and chewy cookies in one. Eh. Not so much. They turned out alright, but I wouldn’t make the recipe again.

My goodness, I am boring,

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

living in the capitol

ok, ok, long time no blog. if you read this blog, you probably got the email detailing my whereabouts the past few weeks. oh the move to DC was hell. i came down with a wicked cold on weds the 22nd at precisely 9pm. i was pet sitting and had gone to the grocery store to make dinner. got back to lexington and worked up an appetite by working out for 25 minutes. i made some grub and sat down to watch QAF season 5 on demand. one eposide into my marathon and my throat began to close on itself, not in that "oh shit i am dying" way but in the "crap, i have a frickin' cold" way.

today, it still persists. i cough up, um, colorful chunks every morning. oops, hope you weren't eating while you read that.

so i hopped on the plane to houston at 6.25am friday the 24th, after my loving and dear sister drove me to the airport. i didn't sleep a wink all night due to anxiety that i would miss the plane. sister isn't known for her ability to get out of bed in the morning, and i never truly trust my phone as an alarm clock. landed in houston a few hours later and met my lady as she got off her one hour late morning flight. i was in what i thought was day 3 of a 10 day cold (my mom always says a cold is 3 days coming, 3 days with you, and 3 days going.. hmmm.. that doesn't add up to 10). we rented a toyota matrix which was a surprisingly nice ride, and stayed in a motel 6 which was un-surprisingly stinky. yes, you can spray too much disinfectant.

moving our crap from the storage unit to the truck went faster than i ever could have expected, what with me blowing my nose every 5 minutes. the downpours started as we loaded the last item into the truck. the drive to 'bama was boring and i was drunk on dayquil which actually makes me sleepy. nyquil makes me comatose. the drive from 'bama to VA was smooth and my lady proved she actually has a lead foot! she's usually a granny driver, but somehow she did a 70 mile stretch in 45 minutes. in a 16' truck. yowsa!

moving into our place went smoothly too, especially after i got us lost and took us on a tour of georgetown. oppsie. J's cousin helped us out and we finished in about an hour. then we hopped back into the truck and headed to MA. my parent's were so sweet to let me keep my crap there for so long. it was really sad to leave them, and even sadder for the gatos. my mom's kitty libby is still looking for emmett. aw. anyhow, made it back to DC and if it weren't for M and C, we would never have finished the move at all. J and i spent the rest of the week unpacking and then she returned to nola and i am all alone. without internet access. i have found all of the local panera's though. and here i sit, enjoying a bowl of fiesta con queso sopa and procrastinating on the job hunt.

someone hire me, please!