ikea

It's embarassing, but my mother and i are becoming close friends with ikea staff, because we go there twice a week. Not only are we there frequently, but we have a routine. When we first arrive, we head directly to the As-Is department, where everything is broken and cheap. She spends about 1/2 hour longer than I do looking. I wait for her, resting on one of the As-Is couches. Then, we buy our crap, bring it out to the car, and return to the store for a snack. Mom gets the apple cake every single time (no fail) and sometimes we get food, sometimes just dessert. We walk through the Marketplace department, commenting on how much money we saved in the As-Is department, comparing prices. On our way out, we hit As-Is once more, you know, in case they brought anything else out... which has happened time and again. The staff recognize us. One lady said "You two were just here the other day!"

Great. I am an As-Is junkie. Everything in my new apartment will say "As-Is" in black marker, or will be Crate and Barrel schtickle. I just want to move into a place, any place, with all my busted crap. Fingers crossed, one of these apartments will work out for us.